Sunday, July 31, 2005

u werent supposed to wait.
werent supposed to think.
now its like.
im guilty.
the cause of it all.

it wasnt supposed to be this way.

smiles @ 21:47.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

nothing really much to blog...
stuff dat are too personal to be put up here
neva realised it was gonna be this tough
but i will survive.
somehow.
there are many options...
but i dont know wad i want
im just delaying...waiting?
dont wanna make the wrong decision again.

the world is such a facade.
everyone has this mask
dats just waiting for pple to unmask and see wads behind.
more often den not.
its not a pretty sight.

i have no idea wad im doing either.
im going by my feelings.

smiles @ 21:25.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

yay.
kayaking's done.
and im NOT a lobster.
=)
its kinda hard to be one la...
considering on both days it rained
before we were done.

capsizing was fun.
doing it once makes u wanna do it again.
though the water at chinese garden
was 'milo'.

went with the e3 pple.
one mad and crazy bunch.
wahahas.

supposed to meet aaron on the bus today.
went to his busstop...
past his busstop.
"where's aaron?"
den he msged serene.
saying dat he was walking there.
we were like.ok...
den MORE den halfway there...
he boarded the bus.
cos his already broken sandals was breaking.
and he was 3 busstops away from chinese garden.
we were like.how kuku can u get?

it was raining when it ended.
and justin fahrun muz dat gang

in the rain
in the middle of nowhere
sat down on the road in chinese garden
lay on the road
den started rolling down the road
to the big puddle of water
all in the rain.

following dat they decided to be nice humans
and picked up a worm and gave it
a 'wild wild wet experience'
letting it flow down the stream of water
at the side of the road.

den they walked to cheers at the mrt station
and ate instant noodles.

crazy and weird.
but definately fun.

smiles @ 20:55.

Monday, July 18, 2005

The smile on my face
It shows everyday
So no one evers knows
How I really feel
Am I really happy?
There's things on my mind
I can't talk about it sometimes
Who can I tell what I really feel
When I'm feeling sorry

its becoming such an act.
a facade.
pple dont know how i really am.
cos i have no idea myself too.
i say im fine...
cos dat'll keep the questions away.
and there's no one dat can understand...
cos im confused myself.

I'll tell you I'm fine
But deep inside I'm dying
When I am all alone
No one sees when lights go down
I cry everynight suffer inside out
No I can't deny this pain is real
But I keep trying

ok maybe im not exactly dying.
nor do i cry myself to sleep.
but im not having a party of my life here either.

dont sterotype me.

smiles @ 21:39.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

i feel.
like such a player.
its like.
im tarzan...
jumping from tree to tree.
i dont wanna sound like
im making excuses or wad la.
but some stuff.
really cant be controlled.
and some stuff...
i guess.are just meant to be.
yeah i know its difficult to understand
cos i dont know wad im bullshit-ting now either
i guess.nows just not the time.
and if its not understood..
or accepted...
i understand.
cos i dont expect it to.

smiles @ 20:21.

Saturday, July 16, 2005

I've got it all
but I feel so deprived
I go up I come down
and I'm emptier inside
Tell me what is this thing
that I feel like I'm missing
And why can't I let it go?

There's gotta be more to life
Than chasing down every
temporary high to satisfy me
Cause the more that I'm
Tripping out thinking
there must be more to life
Well it's life, but I'm sure
there's gotta be more

I've got the time
and I'm wasting it slowly
Here in this moment
I'm half way out the door
Onto the next thing
I'm searching for something that's missing

I'm always waiting
on something other than this
Why am I feelin'
like there's something I missed?

-more to life by stacie orrico

smiles @ 22:18.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

yesterday.
concert was good.
well...technically.
but i found it too technical.
hehs.
but the last song was good.
trumpet and sop sax solos...
created such an uproar
dat dom's and my ears were like.
ringing.
and its kinda weird.
cos we were sitting on the left.
and the whole ac clan was on our right.
so...my poor right ear.
and dom's ear too.
firecrackers. =p

ever had like.
those times when u woke up
and thot it'll be a super beautiful day...
but when u go thru it...
it turns 180 degrees upside down.
or when u woke up and just knew dat.
this day's gonna suck.
and its not cos of a
bad hair day or wad not.

yeah?
well.
me too.

smiles @ 22:26.

Monday, July 11, 2005

im glad...
dats they werent just empty words.
but i guess.
nth's the same.
i dont know how to put it...
it was kind of like.
a relief?happiness?
dat im not forgotten...
dat im not just another one...
i know im not entitled to feel such a way
u're free to go...

smiles @ 19:49.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

havent really been blogging.
havent really got much to blog.
i pride myself in having stuff...
substancial stuff to write...
stuff dat makes u tink...
on my blog.
but.havent really been like.
thinking much.caring much.

was kinda listening to my mp3 just now...
and heard jesse mccartney's beautiful soul
i guess.it brought back memories...
of times there will no longer be.
i know its probably not relevant
and wad right do i have to actually like.
feel such a way.
but are the words really given with their meanings...
do they still apply now?
but i guess.
it doesnt really matter now.
moving on.
to not caring.

you're just a dream
this is my reality
totally insanity
if i could be in your dream
all i wanna do
is be with you be with you
you're just a dream
-you're just a dream by jump5.

smiles @ 21:44.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

i am so tired.
sleepy.
dont wanna think.
dont wanna do anything.
misunderstood?
brain-freezed.
confused.
content?
argh.
looney.
haywired.
hungry.
dying.

-.-

spastic.

smiles @ 22:08.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

ok.uploaded pics of the june bbq
onto the e2 blog...
those u lazy pple better start blogging now !
and appreciate my efforts and time.
=D

im probably in not position to like.
feel this way.
but.feeling are just these...
irritating ?
little things in ur heart and mind dat.
just cant be controlled.
so yeah.
the ownership is no longer mine...
i guess i need time to adjust to dat.

smiles @ 23:20.

Saturday, July 02, 2005

the 2e2`o4 blog
is up and running again...
go check it out pple.

smiles @ 18:08.